Lost in melody

I have a shadow in my heart.
I lost sight of its owner long ago. Probably it was never meant to be.
Memories will eventually be seal off with Time.
This is how the story always go.

A few tried to come near to me, trying to unlock my heart. They can't? I refused to?
I gave a dear a chance 4 years back and he is still the dearest I've ever met.

Few months back someone who bore strong resemblances (or was my mind trying to play tricks on me) came in my life. A brief touch but I was so affected.
I couldn't decide(and perhaps still can't) who was it that really matter?

A test of faith or a test of love?

It was not anyone's fault but if someone has to be push to jump the sea of sin, it will probably be me.

One is now a shadow that I sealed with a kiss.
One is a dear that tried so hard to bring light to my world.
One is someone that I honestly think time is the fault between us. (not that anything is happening though...)

Wo zhen de hao bu zhi suo chuo.
Any step is wrong and any step hurts.

How long can I pretend that everything is fine?